My Motherhood Journey
No calling is greater, nobler, or more fulfilling than motherhood. Every day, as we nurture our children, we as mothers influence the future like no one else can. What an overwhelming responsibility we carry on our shoulders? We constantly questions our actions, as we pray and plead to God to help us make the right choices.
My heart overflows with love and joy for my children. Their bright personalities and beautiful smiles turn my darkest moments around. Even after the most trying days and difficult nights I stop and thank God for choosing me to be Silas and Taegan's Mom, allowing me to care for and love them, and call them my own. But just like ALL the other Moms in the world I face challenges and have struggles, not everyday goes smoothly.
My most recent struggle with Silas has been his night time sleep or lack of night time sleep. I have done more google searches than I can count, talked to any ear that would listen and offer their advice, and tried half the suggestions out there. As a newborn it appeared Silas was going to be a "good sleeper" and by 3 months he had started only waking twice a night to nurse and going back to sleep.
Then, shortly after he turned 4 months he got sick with a respiratory virus and in the process he forgot how to sleep. Ever since then he has been waking 5+ times a night with an occasional "good" night (3 wakings). I suddenly realized how blessed we were that Taegan started sleeping through the night at 12 weeks old and has slept great ever since and how much we had taken that for grated.
Up until Christmas his crib had been in our bedroom and he would spend half of the night in his crib and half in bed with us. I thought maybe Brandon snoring and hearing us move around during the night might be disturbing him, since he appears to be a light sleeper (I thought second children were suppose to be deeper sleepers). So for Christmas (among many other gifts) Silas got a baby monitor and a sound machine. I bit the bullet, shed a few tears, and moved him into his own room. The combination of room darkening curtains and a sound machine have been magic as far as his naps, he has started taking two GOOD naps a day, which as been really nice.
However, the improvement at night has been much more gradual. I am not a supporter of "Cry It Out" I just can't bear to hear my babies cry. I've tried lots of other suggestions though. Put him to bed early, put him to bed later, more cloths, less cloths, darker room, night light, etc. When he wakes up he nurses for as little as 5-15 minutes goes sound to sleep and I lay him back down.
I truly believe he just wants me! And I'm okay with that, I'm his Mom, I want him to need me and want me, he's only 5 1/2 months old he should need me. Once I stopped expecting him to sleep through the night and accepted the fact that this is just where we are right now. Things got better, or maybe my outlook on things just made them seem better. It is also possible I have forgotten what it feels like to be rested, so I have stopped missing that feeling :) Don't get me wrong I'd love to start sleeping at night again but until then I am determined to have a positive attitude about our lack of sleep. He is gradually improving and only waking 2-4 times most nights for the past two weeks...he is so stinking cute though! This to shall pass...
My most recent struggle with Taegan is her struggle to control everything! My sweet, sweet Taegan. She is the most helpful, loving little girl one minute and the next she is stomping her foot, with her hand on her hip, yelling at me because I forgot to let her pour the oatmeal in the bowl, I got too many steps ahead of her going up the steps, or I won't stop what I'm doing and help her put on and take off princess dress after princess dress.
She is three, she is here, and she is making herself known.
I love her bright, strong personality but we do but heads. Oh...discipline, how you confuse me! Do I put her is time out, spank her, take toys away, ignore the behavior? I should be consistent, but there are times I'm not consistent, and then what about when I'm not around and Brandon responds differently. I feel so confused and sometimes I just end up losing my cool, which only results in her getting upset, and me feeling guilty.
I have asked my "Go To Moms" (a Facebook group of local Moms) for some good Christian books on discipline and this is what they came up with:
Boundaries with Kids
The Strong Willed Child
Dare to Discipline
Grace Based Parenting
Shepherding Your Child's Heart
Heartfelt Discipline
Give Them Grace
Gospel Powered Parenting
These Moms are awesome. I have read the reviews on these books and picked out a couple to add to my next Amazon order.
Because the heart of every good Mother desperately worries she's "messing up her child." I just want to do a good job! It is the most important job I have and I want to succeed in raising a happy, respectful, kind, God loving child.
She says some of the cutest things so I have to share our conversation on the way home from Mom's house this morning. We were listening to her Bible Songs CD specifically "Arky Arky." She said "Mom I think Cheyenne and Misty (two of our horses) want to go on the Ark, after I take a nap can we build an Ark? It's going to be lots of water so Cheyenne and Misty will have to ride on the Ark with me." I love her innocence.
My heart overflows with love and joy for my children. Their bright personalities and beautiful smiles turn my darkest moments around. Even after the most trying days and difficult nights I stop and thank God for choosing me to be Silas and Taegan's Mom, allowing me to care for and love them, and call them my own. But just like ALL the other Moms in the world I face challenges and have struggles, not everyday goes smoothly.
My most recent struggle with Silas has been his night time sleep or lack of night time sleep. I have done more google searches than I can count, talked to any ear that would listen and offer their advice, and tried half the suggestions out there. As a newborn it appeared Silas was going to be a "good sleeper" and by 3 months he had started only waking twice a night to nurse and going back to sleep.
Then, shortly after he turned 4 months he got sick with a respiratory virus and in the process he forgot how to sleep. Ever since then he has been waking 5+ times a night with an occasional "good" night (3 wakings). I suddenly realized how blessed we were that Taegan started sleeping through the night at 12 weeks old and has slept great ever since and how much we had taken that for grated.
Up until Christmas his crib had been in our bedroom and he would spend half of the night in his crib and half in bed with us. I thought maybe Brandon snoring and hearing us move around during the night might be disturbing him, since he appears to be a light sleeper (I thought second children were suppose to be deeper sleepers). So for Christmas (among many other gifts) Silas got a baby monitor and a sound machine. I bit the bullet, shed a few tears, and moved him into his own room. The combination of room darkening curtains and a sound machine have been magic as far as his naps, he has started taking two GOOD naps a day, which as been really nice.
However, the improvement at night has been much more gradual. I am not a supporter of "Cry It Out" I just can't bear to hear my babies cry. I've tried lots of other suggestions though. Put him to bed early, put him to bed later, more cloths, less cloths, darker room, night light, etc. When he wakes up he nurses for as little as 5-15 minutes goes sound to sleep and I lay him back down.
I truly believe he just wants me! And I'm okay with that, I'm his Mom, I want him to need me and want me, he's only 5 1/2 months old he should need me. Once I stopped expecting him to sleep through the night and accepted the fact that this is just where we are right now. Things got better, or maybe my outlook on things just made them seem better. It is also possible I have forgotten what it feels like to be rested, so I have stopped missing that feeling :) Don't get me wrong I'd love to start sleeping at night again but until then I am determined to have a positive attitude about our lack of sleep. He is gradually improving and only waking 2-4 times most nights for the past two weeks...he is so stinking cute though! This to shall pass...
My most recent struggle with Taegan is her struggle to control everything! My sweet, sweet Taegan. She is the most helpful, loving little girl one minute and the next she is stomping her foot, with her hand on her hip, yelling at me because I forgot to let her pour the oatmeal in the bowl, I got too many steps ahead of her going up the steps, or I won't stop what I'm doing and help her put on and take off princess dress after princess dress.
She is three, she is here, and she is making herself known.
I love her bright, strong personality but we do but heads. Oh...discipline, how you confuse me! Do I put her is time out, spank her, take toys away, ignore the behavior? I should be consistent, but there are times I'm not consistent, and then what about when I'm not around and Brandon responds differently. I feel so confused and sometimes I just end up losing my cool, which only results in her getting upset, and me feeling guilty.
I have asked my "Go To Moms" (a Facebook group of local Moms) for some good Christian books on discipline and this is what they came up with:
Boundaries with Kids
The Strong Willed Child
Dare to Discipline
Grace Based Parenting
Shepherding Your Child's Heart
Heartfelt Discipline
Give Them Grace
Gospel Powered Parenting
These Moms are awesome. I have read the reviews on these books and picked out a couple to add to my next Amazon order.
Because the heart of every good Mother desperately worries she's "messing up her child." I just want to do a good job! It is the most important job I have and I want to succeed in raising a happy, respectful, kind, God loving child.
She says some of the cutest things so I have to share our conversation on the way home from Mom's house this morning. We were listening to her Bible Songs CD specifically "Arky Arky." She said "Mom I think Cheyenne and Misty (two of our horses) want to go on the Ark, after I take a nap can we build an Ark? It's going to be lots of water so Cheyenne and Misty will have to ride on the Ark with me." I love her innocence.
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